My Choice Today

Today I refuse to be stressed about that which is beyond my choice or control.

Much of the past days/weeks were spent researching, writing, editing, printing, and binding the maiden issue of the foundation and school's newsletter, Arise! 

The first 100 copies of the maiden issue of Arise!

I've been sleeping over at the office with teammates so we could spend longer hours working, not only on the newsletter but on other office details as well. We came to a point when we had to drive the for-home-use printer to work 24/7, and six of us arranged our schedules so there's always someone printing at two-hour shifts twice each day. We began to sleep later and later, and wake up earlier and earlier until the final layout was ready for even more printing.

Then everyone else had to be busy with something else, or away, and I was left to print, sort, bind, and worry when the printer refuses to cooperate as deadlines approached without slowing. Needless to say (but I'll say it anyway), all other work was put on hold - encoding, printing, preparation for the next school term, even laundry, among others. Just thinking about the work (and dirty laundry) piling up sent my brain ticking.

Yesterday, we lost the electricity before I could reach the 200 mark. Early last night, the printer stopped printing the black parts. I worried and fretted and fussed and stressed.

But not today. Today the printer stopped working entirely, calling for a reset and manufacturer service. But I am not at all stressed, not a bit. This is God's work and the uncooperative printer is His problem. He has given us grace enough to meet the most urgent of needs - 300 copies of the newsletter have been sent to the Philippine Youth for Christ congress. I was hoping to send 200 more. But that is enough for now. 

One cannot cram everything into one day. Even God chose to take six days to make this world beautiful. 

"Creation did not crash when God rested; it won't crash when you do."

Our basic printer churning out the cover page of the newsletter.
Even this office setup is relatively tidy.Now imagine the floor
with two mattresses and pages upon pages covering every
square foot.

"One day at a time, sweet Jesus. That's all I'm asking from You. Just give me the strength to do everyday what I have to do. Yesterday's gone, sweet Jesus, and tomorrow may never be mine. So help me today; show me the way one day at a time."

So today I choose to smile and be happy, to do the work that lies nearest at hand, to "do [it] heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men," and to leave tomorrow's worries where they belong - to tomorrow.

Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day [is] the evil thereof. Matthew 6:34 

Today I'm refusing to be stressed by anything. Printer stopped working? Good. I'll have time to wash the dishes, tidy up this office a little, encode a few documents, organize some files, finally call the technician (for the other abused copier), do some meditative reading (because it's easy to get caught up in the work of the Lord that we forget the Lord of the work), say hello to workmates who are suddenly no longer just motion blurs, drool over high-end, high-volume printers on the internet, and maybe even do a little laundry. 

God is merciful in that He sees the needs I could not see (or have been neglecting), and makes a way to meet them. 'Our heavenly Father has a thousand ways to provide for us, of which we know nothing." {DA 330}. And a blackout and an uncooperative printer are just two of them.

The Arise! Editorial staff in uniform shirts and eyebags from
the late nights/very early mornings. Praise God that there's
always joy in His service.

One For the Road

I found something pretty on my way to to the office down the hill today. See how there are six petals on one blossom? All the others had only five.

Yesterday, it was this calf that was apparently born just a few minutes before I came along. If you look close enough, you could see the placenta just beyond where the cows are. The mommy cow was really protective and got mad when I tried to pass. My heart skipped several beats when she attempted to charge at me thrice.

I follow this path at least once every day, and I thank the Lord for preparing something new and special for me every single time - a new thought,  clearer understanding, the green of the rice fields. the colors of the sunset sky, a friend to walk with, the scent of leaves, the other day my own shadow. So many things.

I could almost see Him point to a tiny blossom and excitedly say, "Look, love. This one opened today. It's for you. Ain't it pretty?" 

Then I get so excited about what else is in store for me along the way that I travel day by day, what else He almost can't wait to share with me.

He isn't just a God who sustains me and provides for me. He's someone who wants me to know joy and beauty in things both simple and profound. 

And what can David say more unto thee? for thou, Lord GOD, knowest thy servant.  For thy word's sake, and according to thine own heart, hast thou done all these great things, to make thy servant know [them]. Wherefore thou art great, O LORD God: for [there is] none like thee, neither [is there any] God beside thee, according to all that we have heard with our ears.  

  2 Samuel 7:20-22

and His promise:

Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and show thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not.  Jeremiah 33:3

I just love being a child of the King. Don't you too?

For My Lord, this morning....

I COME TO BE BROKEN

I come to be broken

As clay in my Potter's hands.

I come to cry and to suffer

For things I'd later understand.

So break me, my Maker and God;

I come to be undone.

Make me pure and whole again.

Lord, I come. I come.

11022014

Vigan

The Happiest Place

If someone told me two years ago that I would be leaving my home and my church in Davao City to serve the Lord some place else, I would have laughed. I was practically rooted in that place, and was prepared to spend my lifetime helping the church there as I always have.

But here I am now, up in the mountains somewhere in Ilocos Norte, virtually at the other end of the Philippine archipelago, still happily serving my Lord and excitedly asking where He would take me next, and when.

January this year, I took the six-month Health Evangelism course with a one-month Public Evangelism exposure here at LIGHT Philippines. Little did I then know that I would come back after one month, fully convinced that it is the Lord's will for me and my ministry.

So I've been here as a volunteer for a little over a month, and that period seems to have gone by in a blur. With preparations underway for the school's first Grand Alumni Homecoming (happening now) and 5th Annual Camp Meeting (happening tomorrow), I practically hit the ground running.

Much of the past month was spent going to and from the office/bakery, which is about a kilometer and half from the school, and sleeping over to prepare for the homecoming and camp meeting. Many late nights later, I find myself looking back to home and asking why God has brought me here.

And the answer continues to be an adventure unraveling.

I've met many people, made new friends, learned that God's family is BIG. I've taught my first class, and inevitably have had my first teacher heartbreak. I've been through my first volunteer struggles. I've also quite gracefully survived my first storm - Typhoon Mario - which slammed through our huts, uprooted our trees, and destroyed much of our farm. 

Walking from point to point inside of this campus, I often find myself looking down at my feet and wondering why they are walking this part of the earth.

And the answer comes to me in remembering the life of Abraham:

It was no light test that was thus brought upon Abraham, no small sacrifice that was required of him. There were strong ties to bind him to his country, his kindred, and his home. But he did not hesitate to obey the call. He had no question to ask concerning the land of promise--whether the soil was fertile and the climate healthful; whether the country afforded agreeable surroundings and would afford opportunities for amassing wealth. God has spoken, and His servant must obey; the happiest place on earth for him was the place where God would have him to be.  

{PP 126.3}  

We bloom best where God plants us.

So I take my place among the many who are here, both searching and settled at the same time. I endeavor to work with them, pray with them, learn with them, and serve with them. For as long as God wills that I remain here, I will. And when this new family sing Steve Green's "I Will Go," I know and understand in my heart exactly what they feel and mean:

I will go where there are no easy roads,

leave the comforts that I know.

I will go and let this journey be my home,

I will go, I will go.

And I will go, Lord, where Your glory is unknown;

I will live for You alone.

I will go because my life is not my own.

I will go, I will go.

On Loop in My Heart: God’s Goodness

God is good.

Did that sound cliché to you?

There just isn’t any other way to say it. It’s the closest I could get to expressing that wonderful truth.

God is good.

I could not, for the life of me, find any reason why He would take the time to mold and shape me, to make sure I get everything that I need, to bring people into my sphere of influence. Patiently, He surrounds me and drenches me with blessing after blessing, every single one calculated to fill my individual need. But He does.

God is really just good.

I cannot repeat it enough times.

His goodness I see in nature, in the way He sustains me and my family, in the way He provides for my needs, in the privileges He gives me to serve despite my imperfections. The most wonderful evidence, however, remains to be the outworking of His grace in people’s hearts, bearing fruit in beauty, and mercy, and faithful surrender, and loving service.

One afternoon, I found myself alone in front of my computer, weeping. I was in conversation Kuya Nick, the man whom God had used to bring me to the LIGHT school in Nueva Era, Ilocos Norte, thanking him for being God’s instrument. Instead of taking the credit for himself, He glorified God and asked how God is leading me after the training. He shared to me his burden for today’s educational systems and his vision of establishing a school after God’s blueprint in Davao – a vision I share and desire to pursue.

At the end of our conversation, he said the words that stirred my heart and brought out the tears, “Learn what you can now, and if it be my calling to support you in the work that God has put in your heart to do, then so be it.”

How could it be? How could this man, with his talents and means and beautiful family, be willing to support me – sinful, weak, imperfect me? How could he surrender himself so fully to the Lord’s will? And the Lord – how could He will to entrust a sacred work into my heart – my wicked, wavering heart? How could He believe that I deserve these opportunities to learn and serve? How could He drench me in so much grace?

God is good.

What other reason could there be?

And when I see His goodness overflow in people's hearts to mine, it moves me and makes Him more real and more beautiful to me - so beautiful I could not fully fathom, much less express, just how much. Tears are perhaps the closest I could approach to expressing how I feel, and even that is not enough.

God is good.

God is good.

His mercies are new every morning.

His grace flows without measure.

His love – His unfathomable love – saves me, sustains me, amazes me, and awakens in me a love for Him – my good, wonderfully good, God.

By His Spirit

BY HIS SPIRIT

(Batch Song)

In these closing times,

Do you hear God calling you?

The harvest is great,

But the laborers are few.

Will you plead weakness,

Worry how, or ask for time?

Or now take a stand,

Lift up Christ and let Him shine?

Chorus:

By His Spirit, says the Lord of Hosts.

By His Spirit, we take up our cross.

Not by might nor by power we stand,

But as earthen vessels in His hand.

In every word, every act of life,

By His Spirit, we will light the world

We will light the world with Jesus Christ.

Walk in His footsteps,

Speak His words, see through His eyes.

With faith that works by love,

Live as Christ our Savior died.

With Jesus within,

Our example in all things,

We’ll prepare a people

For the coming of our King

Repeat Chorus

2nd Chorus

When we surrender and give up ourselves

By His strength, we’ll lift up His cross

By His might and His power we stand

Take this life and place it in His hands

Give all glory to Christ and Him alone

By His Spirit, we will do the work,

And we’ll light the world with Jesus Christ.

We will light the world with Jesus Christ!

Back from the Mountains

Now that training's over and I'm off the boondocks, there's so much I can't wait to do: upload photos and vids, get my computer back to shape, update my blog, get home, do the laundry, see everyone, cook (yes, cook), research stuff, organize my files, share the things i've learned, buy clothes na pang Christian Living , and reply to everyone who's been messaging me for the past seven months, among others. I miss the mountains already, but I'm sure that wherever the Lord is taking me will be even more beautiful. I'm still not better than anybody, but I believe that I'm better than who I was. I praise the Lord for His goodness and for His faithfulness in my life. Everyday I learn that He loves me with more love than I could possibly know in this lifetime.

Running

"Today I went out for a run, afraid of the darkness, afraid of falling down, afraid of running out of air. But I ran. And later at group devotion, when the guys sang "O Let Me Walk with Thee," I realized that God wanted me to run with Him, that it's okay to fall, that I can go further and still be alright, that I will gasp for air, that my legs will hurt until the day after, but i will be alright. This morning, I realized that though running from something takes you far and fast, running toward something is always, always more beautiful."

07072014

Life in LIGHT, Nueva Era

“Life is getting funny in Nueva Era.”

Or so two of my classmates would say. We are much into our fourth month of training here at LIGHT, and as is commonly said, it is the time when true character begins to be revealed, and thus is also the time for more interpersonal and intrapersonal conflicts.

December of last year, my church sister Dowry and I travelled from Davao to Manila, to Pangasinan (to attend a camp meeting there), to Cavite, to here in Ilocos Norte, virtually spanning the entire length of the Philippines to attend this Health Evangelism Training here in LIGHT, Nueva Era.

When we arrived here in January, everything was new to us and we didn’t really know where to place ourselves, except that people have always been kind to us, always going out of their way to accommodate us and make things a wee bit easier for us.

We were 25 students in all, including a 71-year old Tatay and a musically-inclined couple (plus their baby). Our classroom was (and continues to be) more than just the multi-purpose hall where we sat to lectures, ate our meals, and held worship and Sabbath services. As it turns out, everywhere we went in this place is a classroom, and everything and everyone we saw was a teacher. We learn daily from work, from people, from nature, from assignments, and from our experiences.

“Character-building” was the watchword, the battle cry, the answer to so many questions and concerns.

We are good so far. We have lost four classmates over time, and are in danger of losing two or three more, but God is good. He has not only sustained us, but has also given us joys to to outbalance the tears and fears, and growth to more than compensate for all the trials.

There’s more to come. We all know it in our bones, there’s much more to come – more of the struggles, the hardship that require painstaking endurance, the conflicts, the everyday battles against self, the testing and trying of patience and faith. And it's alright -no, it's more than alright, because we also know full well that there will be so much more of the learning and growing and blessings and opportunities to be ourselves the blessing.

Thoughts from Week 3

Written January 2014

It has been three weeks since I came to LIGHT Missionary Training Center. I notice that it’s a time when students and volunteers feel that they have adjusted to the schedule, to the amount of work and homework, to one another, and to the cold (yes, the cold deserves to be factored in).

Back home, I usually wake up around 5:00 am, all the while thinking that was early. Here, if I want to get anything done, I must wake up at 3:30. That will give me just enough time for my morning devotional, a bit of personal preparation, daily chores, morning worship, a bit of homework, and then work education (which I am loving so far). In the afternoon, there are the classes, supper, and evening worship. I get back to the dorm around 8:30 pm, pray with the girls at my dorm, do my homework, have my evening devotional, and sleep. There is no leisure time at all! But guess what, I love it. I love that my mind is always occupied, that it doesn’t have the time to wander, that it gets taxed and pushed to think constantly about work, study, and worship.

The classes are wonderful. So far, we’ve had classes on the Spirit of Prophecy, Health Talks, Health Expo, How to Study the Bible, the Plan of Salvation (by far my favorite), Gospel in Action, the Sanctuary, Mental Health and Mission Medicine. I am able to put to use the things that I have learned in my personal studies, and learn so much more. The reality of God’s Word is sometimes so moving that I would find myself in tears during classes. Still, all of the studying that I’m currently doing only serves to remind me of just how much I still do not know.

Then there’s Work Education – half the reason why I came here. After breakfast, we students go to work in different areas: Kitchen, Construction, Mushroom, Agriculture, Bakery, and Vermi-composting. I have been assigned to the Bakery, which is just so fun and informative. But I’m also very excited to learn from the other fields, especially Vermi and Agriculture. On one hand, I’m not used to heavy work and kneading bread is – believe me – heavy work. I can just imagine the exhaustion from tending vegetable gardens and digging for construction work. But I’m still really excited because it’s all useful labor and I know that it will help prepare me to fill my place in God’s work. Plus, I get better health while doing it. God really is wise in putting all that together in one package – work education.

Another thing that I love is the prayer atmosphere in this place. I find myself praying at least 20 times each day, and that’s excluding mealtime prayers and personal prayers! The people, too, are always encouraging one another to pray, study, and speak of spiritual things. It’s only been three weeks, but I’ve already found family in people who share my love for reading the Bible and the Spirit of Prophecy. Whenever there’s a chance, like during meals or while waiting for classes or worship to begin, or even while walking to and during work education, I’d share with them what I have been reading. They’d share their devotionals with me, too. We swap books and quotations, pray together, discuss Bible lessons, share experiences. The exchange is so wonderful that it sometimes makes me want to cry. To me, it’s like a dream come true.

They say here that things usually go well the first two months, and then the real challenges begin. People will then tend to relax more, so they become less guarded and the true characters would surface. Add to that the increasing pressures of work, chores, class requirements and deployment, plus being away from home for so long already. To top it all off, there’s the struggle within against discouragement, personal weakness, and old habits. It’s actually the perfect formula for discord, but in my heart, I really do trust that God will bring us through if we only humble ourselves enough to let Him lead. In fact, I also am just realizing that those circumstances put together also make up quite a good formula for change and growth.

I almost can’t wait to get back home to my family and my church and share with them the things I am learning here. But I will wait. I will wait, work, pray, learn, worship, share, and grow, all by God’s grace. I will keep my promise to them and to God that I will endeavor in all my God-given capabilities to make my time here and my seven-month absence from home worth it because God is making a better co-laborer out of me.

True education means more than taking a certain course of study. It is broad. It includes the harmonious development of all the physical powers and the mental faculties. It teaches the love and fear of God, and is a preparation for the faithful discharge of life's duties.-- "Counsels to Teachers, Parents, and Students," p. 64.  {MYP 168.1} 

True education is the preparation of the physical, mental, and moral powers for the performance of every duty; it is the training of body, mind, and soul for divine service. This is the education that will endure unto eternal life.-- "Christ's Object Lessons," p. 330.  {MYP 168.2}